It is safe to say that my good deeds alone (thus far) can’t (yet) buy me a ticket to heaven. While I have the INTENTIONS to do more, the implementations are a little behind, especially in the ibadah department. That’s a shame really because I have lived long enough to amass ample pahala to guarantee a pleasant afterlife.
When I was little, going to the mosque and attending Quran lessons were not exactly among my favorite activities. I would not go if given the choice, although I never ponteng when I was asked to go, only because I did not want to upset my parents. So I went, but I made sure I didn’t spend more time there than the bare minimum.
Speaking of bare minimum… it’s probably the best description for my ibadah as I still find it hard to go to the mosque or read the Quran. Allah forgive me!
Recently I came across a hadith qudsi (a saying by prophet Muhammad which was revealed to him by Allah Himself… but is not part of the Quran) which goes something like this:
When one intends (niat) to do one good deed, he will be rewarded with one pahala (of that deed) even if he didn’t actually do it. If he went ahead and do it, Allah will award him from 10 to 700 times (or more as He pleases) more pahala.
Whereas when one intends to do one bad deed and then actually does it, he will get one dosa (of that deed). But if he doesn’t he will get one pahala.
(Note: Refer to hadith number 16 in the link above for actual wording.)
So here lies my possible passage to paradise: By NOT doing bad deeds. While my good deeds are few, my not-doing-bad deeds are something I can be (somewhat) proud of. They may just be the crucial element that would tip the (dosa vs pahala) scale in my favor.
